SMILE

What lies beyond a smile
Frightening depths beneath
Fathoms of loneliness
That creeps
Below this smile
A world of pain
Deep inside
A heart beats
With desire unfulfilled
With longing great
Scars that have just been healed
Fester
Bleed anew
They pollute the emptiness inside
They stain the walls of this desolate void
But still a smile
A gesture
Makes it seem like everything is fine
That everything is fucking keen
Under a smile
Fathoms of isolation
Touch an empty shore of numbness
A tunnel spirals
Miles and miles of sadness
To reach a limitless wasteland
A barren garden
Where wilted roses torture my mind
And bereft feelings devour my soul
Reflected in eyes
Filled with desperate need
I stare
I stare merely inches from you
But separated by gulfs of misery
I gaze
Longing for the day when you will
Brave these straits
Crush these roses into powder
And conquer these desires which consume me alive
When you will swim this sea of desolation
To reach me
I wait for you and the dream
Never comes true
I wait for you
And smile
Melancholy
But the day never arrives
The fantasy is never realized
And I’m left
With wilted roses that I daily place on this altar of grief
That I offer with the monument of my soul
Needing
Smiling at you
I smile
I smile...

Copyright by Kavita Nandlal

UNREQUITED

I stare at you with lovelorn eyes
Wrapped up in my vacant pride
Scared to tell you how I feel
Scared to dream
To reveal...
I stare at you with pain filled eyes
You’ll never know
Never know
Why
I stare at you
I stare...
This bittersweet
I’ll always feel
This constant ache
When I’m around you
Your presence brings me grief
You touch robs me of breath
This deep seated pain I feel is because of you
This complicated sea of emotion I swim is your fault
Unfathomed currents I plunge
Plumbing this unswimmable sea
Ever sinking
Drowning in love
My heart is a swollen vessel of ache
A reservoir of hurt
A vessel of pain
I know I should tell you
I know I should
Reveal...
But I’m scared
And I fear your rejection
For it will cut me more
It will wound me deep
And so I stare
With lovelorn eyes
Scared to feel
Scared to reveal
And you'll never know why
I stare
I stare...


Copyright by Kavita Nandlal

THE DISTINGUISHED GUEST

No expense was spared
He was given the red carpet treatment
He was welcomed cordially
He was greeted at the door
A limo was sent to receive him
All reporters were forbidden from seeing him
There in the hall a great banquet was laid
He was the guest of honour
And the beds were made
Everyone was in their finest
And the feast began
Then at the end of it the guest raised his hand
And at once there was silence
And everyone stared at that hand
Yes they stared at that bony white hand
For they knew it meant that the time had come for our guest
To do his bidding and then leave
So with a squeak of the chair
Death rose from the table and stood like a nightmare
Then he strode over to his host
And with a look of regret
He raised his scythe and smote him dead
In the hushed silence of the hall he turned to go
But pausing at the door he gazed at the rest of the guests
And with what could've been a smile he said:
"Thanks for the feast, it was the best I ever did eat".

Copyright by Kavita Nandlal

ODE TO EPIPHANY

Inspiration hath struck
The muse hath spoken
And cryptic verse
Is cloaked no more
For it lies revealed
And I see,
With clear vision, with eyes wide open
Fear?
I shall fear no more these wastelands of paper
These barren desolate sheets
For I am inspired
I am bestowed
With power of the word
And so the story unfolds
And I am made humble
And I am made meek
At the way in which the fountains of prose gush and storm
And flow with thunderous speed
Until my pen is tortured and broken
And the sheets choked
With words insightful and bleak
And yet still
Epiphany creeps
My brain bursting and sore
Continues to pour forth
Wondrous verses
And paragraphs galore.


Copyright by Kavita Nandlal